THE BABY YEARS

  • A SNUFFLEUPAGUS IN KID’S CLOTHING

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, D-scoveries, The Baby Years, Thoughts

    6 Comments

    So, I’m preparing lunch in the kitchen and from out of nowhere, I hear Indy calling out from behind the couch on his playmat, pointing to a picture of a mother duck and her ducklings and going, “Gwark, gwark, gwark,” (his equivalent of ‘quack, quack, quack’). I’m totally gobsmacked. Repeatedly, over and over again, “Gwark, gwark, gwark…gwark, gwark, gwark.” So, I fire back at him, “Gwark, gwark, gwark”, and he echoes back at me, “Gwark, gwark, gwark”.

    Our first official conversation, even if it was in Gwark. That is until…I pick up the video camera to film it. Then it’s like it never happened. Like Robert DeNiro in the end of Awakenings, he slips back into his non-communicative state. The same glazed over look you see when someone describes the concept of Celebrity Splash or when journalists ask Tony Abbott anything about politics. Why is it only me that sees these things?

    It’s like Sesame Street when I was a kid and Big Bird had an imaginary friend that nobody else could see, his shaggy elephant buddy, Mr Snuffleupagus. The thing about ‘Snuffy’ was that he actually was real but was always gone before anyone else could see him. And that’s how I feel. I’m Big Bird and whenever I try to show someone something cool that Indy does, he pulls a ‘Snuffy’, and I’m left hangin’ like I’m making it all up.
    (more…)

  • THAR SHE BLOWS!!

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Events

    No Comments

    Hello Everyone,

    Well, it took a bit longer than expected (although Indy was 11 days overdue, so I shouldn’t really be at all surprised), but I am happy to announce that our new site has just gone ‘live’.

    You can now find us here at www.40YrOldDad.com.

    But don’t worry if you go back to our old wordpress.com site, you’ll find your way right back here at our new home.

    While our email subscribers will continue to receive email notifications of new posts as before, (no problemo, amigos), WordPress.com followers will only see new posts in the WordPress Reader.

    But for our WordPress.com followers who do wish to continue to receive email updates of new posts, be sure to pop by the new site and subscribe with your email address in the ‘Subscribe’ box or enter your email address into the ‘Subscribe’ box here:

    Subscribe to Blog via Email

    Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

    Big thanks to tech-extraordinaire, Alanna from Web Babble, for helping us launch the new site.

    We sure hope you like it.

    — Join us…join us…join us… 🙂

    On the move to 40yrolddad.com

     

  • EVEN STEVENS

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, D-scoveries, Events, The Baby Years

    3 Comments

    3-2-1…

    That’s it!!

    7.27pm: Marks the point at which our little man has now lived longer on the outside of the womb, than the time spent inside the womb.

    Which officially makes us…

    Even-Stevens!

    He’s as much mine as he is your’s now, Mumma. (Don’t try to defeat my logic, it will only end in tears for all us…and by ‘us’, I mean…me).

    You’ve spent 41 weeks and 4 days with him on the inside and I’ve spent 41 weeks and 4 days on the outside. I know you were there too…tut-tut. Hush, my love….AND SLEEP! (I’m having a moment). (more…)

  • WORLD’S GREATEST DAD?…WORLD’S BIGGEST HEEL

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, D-scoveries, Dad Mishaps, Thoughts

    8 Comments

    It was a day I hoped would never come.

    I’ve prided myself on being the cool calm collected one.

    A dad so cool, the sun needs a sweater when it shines on me!

    The dad who flows like water, who bends in the wind, goes with the flow and smells like teenspirit. (Wait…is that a cologne? I have no idea).

    The kind of dad who exists only in family sitcoms. Loves his family, does crazy and outlandish things, quick with the funny remarks, dishes out sage worldly advice and never…ever…EVER…raises his voice in anger.

    The kind of dad where Zen is my friend and karma is my confidanteė…

    So, what went wrong? (more…)

  • TEETHING – STOCKS LIMITED, GET YOUR’S TODAY

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Body Functions, Events, The Baby Years

    1 Comment

    Oh man, teething… how cool is that? I mean, everybody tells you about it, but they forget to tell you just how absolute fun, it can be!

    Let’s play Baby Chefs. Where I’m an aspiring chef preparing you a lovely meal and you can be Gordon Ramsay, telling me it’s all sh*t, you’re having none of it and send it ALL back to the kitchen.

    Like guessing games? Okay…which cheek is redder?

    Or, the perennial favourite…throw up in a public place? The fun never stops!

    And productive, my god…totally!

    It’s great for your health. Forget aerobics, patooey to pilates, scrap the stairmaster and throw away your old exercise machine forever. Who needs a gym membership when you’ve got, teething! (more…)

  • BUB TOOTH TIME MACHINE

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, D-scoveries, The Baby Years, Thoughts

    5 Comments

    As a kid growing up, I was obsessed with two things. Collecting bread tags…and time travel. (Uh…forget I mentioned the first thing)…

    Wide-eyed and tousled hair (yes, I did have hair once and I assure you, it was quite tousled), I disappeared into TV shows like Time Tunnel, Doctor Who, Quantum Leap, Sliders, Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, Star Trek, Planet of the Apes, Ready Steady Cook (again, forget that last one). I built my own play TARDIS in the backyard and fantasised about travelling through time and space.

    Then came the movies; The Time Machine, The Philidelphia Experiment, Timecop, Time Bandits, Terminator and Terminator 2, DejaVu, Austin Powers, The Time Traveller’s Wife, Hot Tub Time Machine and of course Back to the Future, just to name a few. All fuel for the Mr.Fusion that is, the Delorean of my mind, flitting backwards and forwards in time and space trying to figure out the hows and the whys. (more…)

  • SPREADING MY SEED

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, D-scoveries, Events

    7 Comments

    Well, today was probably the manliest Dad-thing I’ve managed to accomplish since the creation of my son. And coincidentally, both things involved the spreading of seed.

    For months now, the lawn in our backyard has been dying a slow and agonising death, much like the Hollywood career of Lindsay Lohan. But unlike “Lilo”, there’s a pretty good chance of recovery if I’ve done my homework, properly.

    After spending the day gittin’ down’n dirty with ma hoes (yo), I got all up in my backyard’s face, woz all over dat sh*t and got to the biznez of whipin’ that lawnz ass, foshizzel. (more…)

  • THE NOTSO-FAST WEEKEND GETAWAY

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Dad Mishaps, Events, The Baby Years

    1 Comment

    Easter is synonymous for many things. Eggs, chocolate, rabbits, men with beards, hot cross buns, walking zombies and of course…traffic.

    So, with that in mind, we decided to get a head start on the weekend and leave for Oma & Opa’s (a marathon 4.5hr drive interstate), on Thursday afternoon. That way, we hoped to avoid hirsute men of all descriptions and while Mumma packed the bags, I packed the car.

    Cramming the last of the contents of a small European nation into our matchbox sized sedan (does he really need more than 1200 changes of clothes?) The “eye-roll” suggests, “yes”, the scowl suggests, “just keep packing and shut the hell up”. (more…)

  • STAND AND DELIVER

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Events, The Baby Years

    4 Comments

    Brutally hard at work in my office (see: trolling through Facebook), my heart leapt to my throat when my lovely wife sent out a scream from the living room…

    “Quick, to the batmobile…er, baby’s room!”

    Batteries to power, turbines to speed, paternal instincts kicked into high gear! Nadia Comaneci’d it over my office chair, nabbed a cricket bat mid-flight, kicked the door open, wide-eyed and alert like Shaun of the Dead, ready to wail the willow over any would-be zombie assailant within 3 miles of my son.

    Fully expecting our little bloke to be choking, something fallen on him, wrapped in a cord or going Mano-a-Mano with a giant lizard creature from the Gorn Hegemony (see: Star Trek: Kirk VS Gorn), preparing my best Charlton Heston impression…

    “Get your filthy paws off him, you damn dirty ape!” (more…)

  • WORKING OUT “INDY-GYM”

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Events, The Baby Years

    2 Comments

    Space: the final frontier (how apparent that we’re quickly running out of it). These are the voyages of the commando crawling, Indy-prise. His 8 month mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilisations, to boldly go where no man has gone before…

    Gymbaroo!!

    (Not to be confused with the Boy Scout’s gigantic week long Jamboree, nor a 3 day festival of Jim Carrey and Jim Belushi films, Jimbaroo – and if there is such a thing…god help us all).

    It is in fact, the biggest playmat exercise adventure experience (the size of a basketball court), that Indy has ever seen AND…a heralded saviour and answer to my prayers when wondering how many times can our little bloke circle the couch on his belly, play with the same plastic blocks day after day, figure out my tax receipts and change the oil in my car…all without getting bored? (more…)