The Baby Years Archives - Page 10 of 11 - The 40YrOldDad The 40YrOldDad

July 29

WHO WAS THAT MASKED MAN?

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, The Baby Years
2 Comments

29
JUL

My wife’s niece celebrated her 21st birthday yesterday, with an (Ooh-la-la), Burlesque themed, Masquerade Party.

And if there’s one thing we loved doing as a couple, it’s dressing up in crazy costumes.
(I say again…ooh-la-la). And now, we get to experience our crazy getups…

As a family 🙂

Donning our decrotive masks and pseudo A Clockwork Orange-esque styled outfits, we piled into the Bat-mobile and stole away into the night, like a gang of masked crime fighters on the prowl for truth, justice and the Australian way. (more…)
July 27

A RIGHT ROYAL WELCOME

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, The Baby Years, Thoughts
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27
JUL

It seems that little Indy has his very own…international appeal 🙂

At a point in time when all eyes are on the motherland for the 2012 Olympic games, it seems the motherland has a sneaky eye on our little man.

Freshly delivered by the Royal Mail, a beautiful card arrived with a £20 note so crisp, the Queen herself must have just finished printing her face into it, to kick start Indy’s financial future. One can only imagine this Royal Blue Envelope (blue for boys), might well have passed through just as many hands as the Olympic torch, on it’s incredible journey around the world. Right into our humble little mailbox, Downunder.

Thankfully, it wasn’t the Olympic torch. Last thing we need is our mailbox burned to the ground.

But, it does make me wonder… (more…)
July 26

HAVE YOUR CAKE AND WEAR IT TOO

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, The Baby Years, Uncategorized
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26
JUL

Today marks our little Indy’s three week anniversary of breathing life on this planet.

And what better way to celebrate this occasion, than with a fantastic congratulatory cake delivered right to our door, from two of our close friends in Sydney.

At least, it would be…if the cake was actually here!!

One of the side-effects of being Adventurers Extraordinaire is that, short of having the local vet implant a microchip under our skin or matching his’n’hers ankle monitors, it’s damn well almost impossible to keep track of all the different addresses we’ve dwelled in over the years. We seem to change addresses more often than John Travolta changes massage therapists.

So, it was no surprise to discover our cake was mistakenly delivered to…

The wrong address…

(And incidentally, we’ve actually moved twice since that place).

So, I jammed into gear and trekked back to our old address only to find…

Nobody home. (more…)
July 21

IT ALL BOILS DOWN TO THIS

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, The Baby Years, Thoughts
1 Comment

21
JUL

Apart from a couple trips outside for baby health checks and to bring the garbage bins back in off the street, I haven’t moved outside of a six foot radius between the sink, the stove and the laundry basket…in over six days!

Like Lucille Ball in the infamous chocolate factory conveyor belt scene. I’m like the flustered production line worker desperately trying to juggle and manage the ever increasing, non-stop conveyor belt of shift rotations between washing puked-on baby and parent clothes, preparing formula top-ups and my god…

The boiling…What’s with all the boiling??!!

Bottles, dummies, teats, breast pumps, furniture, roofing tiles. You name it, it goes in the pot. I think Starbucks “worldwide”, boils less water than I do. Not since the Three Witches in Shakespeare’s Macbeth or Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction (How do you like your bunny? Boiled, steamed or fried?), has there been so much action around a bubbling cauldron.

I’ve never quite understood the purpose behind ensuring everything that goes into the baby’s mouth is more sterile than a Chernobyl eunuch in a uranium cod-piece. It’s not like you can boil his own fingers or his mother’s nipples for that matter. I mean, look at places like India, Africa or China. I’m pretty sure not everyone there is boiling everything all the time, and they have baby populations almost as big as Frankston. (more…)
July 18

GOING, GOING…GONE.

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, The Baby Years
1 Comment

18
JUL

Our son’s first week at home has been nothing, if not, eventful. And thanks to my own childhood boot camp Boy Scout training (bar that one embarrassing incident at Brownies), we were pretty much setup and definitely came prepared. But the one thing we weren’t prepared for, was…

The Zombie Apocolypse

I mean, we always knew it was going to happen. People have waved placards about it. There was even that documentary on the subject that Simon Pegg “You’ve got RED on you”, made with his cricket bat. And, low, we did heed the warning signs, but like Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries when hearing the statistics that one-in-one “reality-tv weddings” end in divorce, we too said…

“That won’t happen to us”.

But low…it did happen. Hypnotized by a tiny invader, he infiltrated our defenses and we’ve both been bitten. (more…)
July 11

BATH TIME

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Dad Mishaps, The Baby Years, Thoughts, Tips
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11
JUL

There’s something very spiritual about holding your newborn son in the palm of your hands and watching him melt between your fingers, like a Kit-Kat on a sunny day, as you wash the warm sudsy water across his tiny soapy body. That spiritual bond I felt when his eyes first opened, embraced me again like a soft warm blanket thrown lovingly round my shoulders.

He looks into my eyes as if to say…

“This is the greatest thing I’ve experienced on tour, so far.”

And the feeling is mutual.

This is definitely a “Daddy Moment”. Caring and nurturing the most precious life in your hands, and he places complete love and trust in yours.

And that unspeakable bond has taught myself an incredibly valuable lesson…

Dad Mishap #2…

When you’re washing your son’s little bottom in the bath, if his bottom is OUT of the water…
it means…his head is definitely IN it.

And when I say, unspeakable…I mean, (let’s never speak of this incident, ever again…ever). (more…)
July 10

THE DUMMY DILEMMA

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, The Baby Years, Thoughts
3 Comments

10
JUL

To suck…or not to suck?…That, is the question.

One thing we’ve learned as new parents, from the actual delivery through to bringing our son home, is that the best made plans are…

Don’t make plans!

As far as our birthing plan went, the only things that went to plan, was the music we had playing during the labour and the fact that…a baby came out at the end. Everything else…went straight out the window.

Same at home. Many is the night we wailed away over the virtues of what good parenting should be all about, and we both agreed…we didn’t want our child to have a dummy.

That is, until…we actually had a child.

Fast forward to 2:30am on Indy’s first night at home (aka: my first night at all, with him). Not since the Spanish Inquisition, has more houses been upturned and lives been uprooted. Like King Arthur’s quest for the Holy Grail, I left no box unturned, no cupboard unrifled, no garage unpillaged…all for the sake of peace, harmony and to…just make it stop! Suddenly there it was. The elusive grail was within my grasp…

I knew we had one somewhere. Like the Incredible Hulk forcing his way against rippling sonic blast cannons, I pushed through the noise and popped the dummy in Indy’s mouth. And there it was…

Hello darkness my old friends, Simon and Garfunkle with…The Sound Of Silence. (more…)
July 9

HOME BOY!!

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, The Baby Years, Uncategorized
No Comments

9
JUL

Dun-dudda-dun-dadda-dun-dudda-dun-dun-da-daaa…Dun-dudda-dun-dudda-dun-dudda-dun-dudda-dun-dudda-dun-dum-daaa!

Round ’em up Hoss, the Cartwrights are finally back at the Ponderosa – “Yeehar!!”

It’s a Bonanza day because today’s the day we all get to come home to begin the next chapter in our lives…

“FAMILY LIFE”

That means our name will be forever etched in the mahogany trophy cabinet in the sky, alongside family greats such as;

The Brady’s
The Cosby’s
The Seaver’s
The Cartwright’s
The Robinson’s
The Ewing’s
The Cunningham’s
The Cleaver’s
And even…
The Kardashian’s
(Full points to you if you can name each TV show)
**And thank heaven’s you have a life, if you can’t. (more…)
July 8

GETTING TO KNOW YOU

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Body Functions, Dad Mishaps, In the Womb, The Baby Years
4 Comments

8
JUL

Nothing can quite prepare you for your first encounter with your child. I really didn’t expect to be so attached to him. I kind of expected the feeling would be the same as when I meet other people’s kids…

You know, they’re fun and interesting…now, who’s for Cribbage…anyone?

But I can’t explain the change that occurs when he opens his eyes for the very first time and you lock eyes for…one minute. His tiny deep blue eyes scanning your face, peering deep into your soul. It touches you in a way that doesn’t require Investigative Journalism. Instead, it bonds you for life. Like Superglue and Araldite…(I loved their show in Vegas, btw).

And there’s no greater bonding experience between a man and his son, that makes you feel like…the worst dad on the planet, than when you’re changing his little nappy. And as you clear away his troubles, he looks up at you with the purest of love and trust that would melt Wolverine’s Adamantium claws. You turn to reach for a clean nappy…and that’s when the screams begin…you turn back with horror to see little Indy…

Peeing on his own face!

It makes your heart sink, and makes you want to run crying from the room like a school girl. But you have to suck it up “Mary-Ellen” (your nerve, that is…not the pee. Use a cloth for that…and wash your hands afterwards), because you’ve got to rebuild that bridge of trust. The one bonded by Superglue, which apparently can lift a one-tonne sedan with only 7 drops (I saw it on Mythbusters), yet, completely disintegrates under the influence of baby urine…go figure?

(more…)
July 8

FIRST PEEKS

AUTHOR: 40YrOldDad // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, The Baby Years
6 Comments

8
JUL

I know, I know…it’s been three days already and still no pics?

Well, I just needed to find a little time to post them up, when I wasn’t being all Super-Dad, flitting between hospital and home and sleeping during whatever free minute I could find. Some days, I even sleep in the car during “Mother’s Time” at the hospital, when they kick all the dad’s to the curb for a couple hours. Where’s the Dad’s Time? When do we get to sleep?

I have a kid now, so I already know the answer…NEVER!!!

But without further ado, exclusively to the 40Yr Old Dad…

I proudly present, our son…Indy (more…)