1-2 YEARS

  • SUPER INDY

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 1-2 years, Events, The Baby Years, Trailers, Videos

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    The past decade has seen an avalanche of Superhero movies hitting our eyeballs. (I say that like it’s a bad thing…nu-uh)

    Well hold on to your hats folks, coz there’s a whole bunch more Superhero movies just waiting in the wings.

    Check out the latest trailer of what’s to come… (more…)

  • THUFFERING THUCOTASH

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 1-2 years, D-scoveries, Dad Mishaps, The Baby Years, Tips

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    ‘Thith morning’ I had to wonder if our boy was 14 months old or 14 years old, as he displayed an uncharacteristic rebellious streak most often reserved for teenagers than toddlers. The type of rebelliousness that incorporates chains, tattoos and heavy metal rock bands. Spikey hair, Doc Martin boots and Alice Cooper makeup. Leather pants, torn jeans and mono-syllabic grunts with obscene hand gestures.

    But for our boy, his rebellious weapon of choice…

    ‘Body Piercings’, in his case specifically…

    HIS TONGUE.

    And like most rebellious youths, rather than have a professional perform the gruesome task under strict sterilised conditions in a clean controlled environment, our Billy Idol wannabe opted for the ‘home job’ by piercing his own tongue (not with a sterilised needle), but with his very own…

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  • TOLD OFF

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 1-2 years, D-scoveries, The Baby Years

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    If there’s one thing I’ve come to understand in the 14 months I’ve been a Dad, is that toddlers know way more than I ever thought they did. And although he’s not yet conversive in the English language, there is a universal language devoid of any words that my 14 month old son is completely fluent in…

    Body Language.

    Now although he has difficulty controlling his own movements, when it comes to observing and interpreting the movements of other people, he doesn’t miss a trick. And it taught me a very valuable lesson…it’s not what you say or even how you say it that counts, it’s whether or not he can see you when you’re saying it. (more…)

  • THIS IS HUGE!!

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 1-2 years, D-scoveries, Events, The Baby Years

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    Holy cow, we hit a HUGE milestone today…
    And as a clue, here’s some funky lyrics to help shed some light on the matter…

    Step OneWe can have lots of fun 
    Step TwoThere’s so much we can do
    Step ThreeIt’s just you for me 
    Step FourI can give you more 
    Step FiveDon’t you know that the time has arrived

    Can you guess the song, the band and the hair styles?

    If you can, one of two things just happened.

    You squealed like a girl…or you groaned like a man. (Both sounds are equally as interchangeable between both sexes. Some men have been known to squeal like a girl when they hear this band and are instantly transported back to 1990…not naming any names) 😉

    This can only mean one thing… (more…)

  • SUB-URBAN COWBOY

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 1-2 years, D-scoveries, Events, Places, The Baby Years

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    “Home…home on the range. Where the pigs and the creepy goats play…”

    Ever had an unexpected surprise that turned something potentially ho-hum into something ho-ly crap, this is pretty cool? Like when they originally announced Big Brother was returning, but instead of Gretel Killeen hosting, it will be Sonia Kruger. Or when Matt Smith was first announced as the 11th Doctor Who. Or when M&M’s announced they were adding peanuts to their candy?

    Well, the same thing happened when Mumma announced she was taking Granny, Indy and myself to…The Collingwood Children’s Farm.

    In my head, I had imagined a small petting zoo. A few corrals with straw, some guinea pigs, rabbits and something exotic thrown in. Maybe a man-eating tarantula…like, Paris Hilton? I mean, it’s Collingwood for crying out loud (ie: inner-city suburbia), what do you expect to fit inside a 1×1 bedroom apartment on top of a fish’n’chip shop? But when we arrived, I had to check we hadn’t just blown in off a tornado because what we saw there definitely had a, “I don’t think we’re in Kansas no more”, kind of vibe to it. (more…)

  • IRONINGMAN

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 1-2 years, D-scoveries, Gadgets, Sponsored Posts, The Baby Years, Thoughts

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    Remember the time I revealed my super secret super-duper OCD powers? Well, like Tony Stark from The Avengers, IRONMAN (or should that be, IRONING MAN?), was put through his paces this week when I had the opportunity to test out the latest in the range of revolutionary steam generators (or whiz-bang, tricked-out steam irons), in the form of the Philips PerfectCare Aqua. And trust me, my OCD superpowers were definitely put to the test.

    Right off the bat when I opened the box, I was reminded of what Mumma thought first time she ever saw me naked…this thing was HUGE. But, pot-bellies aside…it was so big, Indy informed us he was moving out of home and into the cardboard box it came in…because he needed the extra room!

    Philips PerfectCare Aqua Box  Indy moves into his new apartment

    But when I had it all setup and ready to go, the iron itself is quite small and light, but it’s the huge water tank it’s attached to that makes up the bulk of the unit. It kind of resembles a space helmet like the one that Ed Harris wears filled with liquid oxygen in The Abyss. It’s more like an aquarium than a water tank. I’m not saying it’s big, but Indy did keep looking for Nemo.

    liquid oxygen helmet and iron station comparison

    I really do ‘loves me some technology’. Which is probably why our house glows after dark and our pyjamas resemble radiation suits. So, the space-agey look appeals greatly to me but…the revolutionary OptimalTemp technology, scares the bajeezuz out of my OCD. See, the thing about this steam iron is…it has NO SETTINGS. (more…)

  • COCK-BLOCKER!

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 1-2 years, D-scoveries, The Baby Years, Thoughts

    4 Comments

    If you’re unfamiliar with the term, a “cock-blocker” is somebody or something that interferes with a man’s intention and ability to get to ‘home plate’ with the respective object of his desire. In other words, prevents you from…gittin’ sum.

    And when you have a one year old child in your midst, then you know the last year has been a little lean in that regard. Suffice to say, ‘uninterrupted alone-time together’ is as rare as hen’s teeth, (or complimentary reviews about Lara Bingle.)

    And this past week has been a stark reminder that if calculations are off, even NASA can’t get the Space Shuttle safely through the re-entry window without an explosive shower of fire and debris. I’m no astronaut and it shouldn’t be rocket science to figure it out. It’s all about ‘timing’, so as a comedian, I should have that in spades. (more…)

  • BALI BRUDDAHS

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 1-2 years, Events, The Baby Years

    2 Comments

    Laurel and Hardy, Abbott and Costello, Seinfeld and Costanza, some of the greatest enduring friendships in history, and thanks to our recent trip to Bali, we can now add…Indy and Angga to that list.

    A ‘bro-mance’ made in heaven Bali. From the very instant these boys met, they were Bali Bruddahs for life! I guess both lads being conceived in Bali has grounded in them a spiritual connection to this beautiful island and ultimately, to each other.

    Vegas doesn’t light up as much in each other’s company as these two boys. Right from the get go, there was laughing, smiling and much excited hand flapping between them. And language was no barrier to their symbiotic order of play and merriment either. Angga speaks both Indonesian and English while Indy has only mastered ‘Indyspeak’, yet they both seemed to communicate on a level of coordination rarely seen on So You Think You Can Dance.

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