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  • JUST ADD WATER

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Events, The Baby Years

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    Found a great recipe today.

    Take one 7 month old baby boy…

    And just add water!

    Indy’s first swimming lessons.

    And boy, he takes to water like Justin Bieber takes to hair products…

    “Let me at ’em, LET ME AT ‘EM!”

    The way he was windmilling his little arms with excitement, he could have powered through the water like a little motor boat, or taken out 10 guys at once in a boxing title fight.

    His confidence in the water is like Billy Crystal, on stage. Singing, dancing and entertaining as hell.

    It’s like he used to live the first 9 months of his life in a liquid environment…(or something?) (more…)

  • HE SLIMED ME…

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Dad Mishaps, Events, The Baby Years

    8 Comments

    If you’re a fan of the movie, Ghostbusters, then you will no doubt remember the scene when Egon and Ray stumble upon Peter Venkman, writhing on the floor in a glistening wet pool of ectoplasm following his first encounter with a real ghost, and uttered those inimitable and prophetic words…

    “He slimed me…”

    I say, prophetic, because fast forward to today, my official first day as Stay-At-Home Dad after Mumma returned to work today, and as I just finished giving my son his mid-morning bottle of “Chard-o-mamma”, I found myself uttering that exact same phrase. A few mls short of finishing off the bottle, he turned his face away in the same way you can’t look at the screen whenever Tori Spelling comes on the TV. I asked him if he needed to burp, and as I placed him upright in my lap, it sounded like he’d just released The Kraken. (more…)

  • WHATCHOO TALKIN’ ‘BOUT, WILLIS?

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Events, The Baby Years

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    Ever had the desire to do something, “just because you can?”

    This morning we woke up and the tiny voice that talks to me inside my head, was actually outside my head, and we both did a double-take when we realised…

    Holy cow, our son can talk!

    It’s as if Indy suddenly woke up today and decided to speak, “just because he can”.

    And his first words of choice…

    DA-DA!

    YESSSSSS!! (Hi-fives all round…cigars anyone?)

    Next on the agenda of his Parliamentary Address… (more…)

  • DO ME A SOLID?

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 6-12 months, Food, The Baby Years, Thoughts, Tips

    6 Comments

    KNOCK-KNOCK
    Who’s there?
    My six monks.
    My six monks who?
    My six monks old baby, that’s who!

    Can you believe it? Our little bloke has just notched up half a year on his nappy belt. Which makes me wonder if he’s still considered a baby or is he now a toddler? And what actually is the difference? Sources tell me a toddler is when he starts wearing velvet robes, a cravat, smokes a pipe and sips martinis. (“Sources” is a term used loosely for the voices in my head). And if that’s the case, Hugh Hefner is the luckiest toddler in town. (more…)

  • 2012 WORDPRESS REVIEW

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Events, The Baby Years, Thoughts, Tips

    2 Comments

    Wowzers!

    Thank heavens for cheeky monkeys. The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

    Here’s an excerpt:

    600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 6,500 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 11 years to get that many views.

    Click here to see the complete report.

    Loves me some WordPress goodness. Check it out, it’s very cool.

    See you next year!!!

  • 2012: A YEAR IN REAR-VIEW

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Events, The Baby Years, Thoughts

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    2012…the year we had to have.

    Well, we didn’t have to. I mean, some people didn’t want us to have it at all. (At least, not all of it…bloody Mayans). What do they know? Certainly nothing about making calendars, that’s for sure.

    Imagine if things had ended on December 21…it would be like watching The Sixth Sense and turning it off with two minutes left to go and thinking…

    “Yeah, it was okay but…I didn’t really get it?”

    But for us, it was a phenomenal year. Not to mention, it was the best year of Indy’s life(and he only came in at the half way mark, around when Haley Joel Osment tells Bruce Willis, he sees dead people).

    Adjusting my rear-view mirror as 2012 disappears over the horizon, I see we had the birth of our beautiful boy, the Swans won the Grand Final, I got Indy got…some gnarly signatures on my his Swans cap, I paid off my car and remain unofficially debt-free, the end of the world didn’t happen (always good to know it’s exactly where you left it, under your pillow, when you wake up in the morning), aliens didn’t invade us (and frankly, how could they? Haven’t you seen Border Security? You can’t even bring rice into the country, let alone some extra-terrestrial beings. Apparently it’s only one terrestrial being per passenger, “extras” will have to be declared, I’m afraid). (more…)

  • SANTA’S LI’L HELPER

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Events, The Baby Years, Thoughts

    2 Comments

    Waking up to the sounds of a giggling child, I’m reminded that I really should change my alarm ring tone to something a little more grown-up. And as I hit the snooze and roll over to be greeted by the warm comfort of baby sick down my front, I’m also reminded that I really should shower and change my shirt before coming to bed of an evening.

    But amid the fabricated exploits of this morning’s misadventures, I can’t help but feel there’s a certain sense of excited anticipation about this morning that I haven’t experienced since my wedding night, and before that…when I was a kid. If only I could put my finger on exactly what it is…oh, wait. I know what it is. It must be…

    Christmas Morning!!

    And the reason for my heightened level of excitement, is of course, the fact that this is…

    Indy’s First Christmas…

    And our first Christmas…as a family. (more…)

  • 40YROLDDAD’S CHRISTMAS ADVENT BLOG POST

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Daddy Blogger Challenge, Kris Kringle Advent Calendar Challenge 2012, The Baby Years, Thoughts, Tips

    12 Comments

    On the 8th day of Christmas my Facebook stalker, militant communists Aussie Dad Bloggers gave to me – a story about why men can’t see sh#t, right in front of their face. You asked, we answer… in the Christmas spirit, us Aussie Dad Bloggers are answering the questions raised by readers.

    Q: “Are men ACTUALLY visually impaired when it comes to locating objects inside the home?”

    The short answer…NO.

    The slightly longer answer…NU-UH.

    Trust me, there’s plenty of objects inside the home we have absolutely no trouble locating with our eyes closed. The corner of the coffee table in our shin, the die-cast metal hot-wheels car underfoot, our own playground equipment downstairs.

    Men are like dolphins, and use echo location sonar to find objects we can’t see. Dolphins use a series of clicks and whistles to locate objects underwater like fish, sunken treasure and universal remote controls. Men use a slightly more complex version of sounds such as, “Where’s the bloody car keys?” or “What happened to the potato masher?” With dolphins, the sonar bounces off the objects and back to the dolphin, helping him to determine it’s location. With men, the sound bounces back in a more female tone such as, “Did you try looking in the kitchen drawer?” or “They’re right in front of you on the bench!”

    However…if you are a theoretical physicist or even a keen fan of Doctor Who, then you will no doubt realise there is an actual phenomenon that exists in the universe, known as “Brittany Spears” or in scientific terms…

    “Temporal Displacement”

    Which sounds like something you do when you momentarily lose your mind, or skim rocks off Japanese battered fish…wait…that’s tempura. (Really, I thought was a car?) (more…)

  • NO ROCK IN HIS ROLL

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Events, The Baby Years

    No Comments

    I wouldn’t say I’m fussy or particular (though my wife may have words to the contrary on that), but is it too much to expect to find things…where you left them?

    I mean, if I’m using or playing around with something and then I put it down for just a second, expecting to return to it in a jiffy, am I setting the expectation bar, too high, to think it would be in the exact same place I left it?

    It’s the kind of thing you’d expect from your surgeon: When I wake up, can you please make sure all my organs are where I left them? It’s what you expect from your mechanic: When I pick up my car, can you please make sure all it’s engine parts are where I left them? It’s even what you’d expect from volunteering to be strapped to a spinning wheel while a blindfolded knife-thrower hurls razor sharp blades at you: When I open my eyes and stop spinning, can you please make sure all my appendages are exactly where I left them? But, is it too much to expect…

    From your baby? (more…)

  • AUSSIE DADDY BLOGGER ADVENT CALENDAR CHALLENGE 2012

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Daddy Blogger Challenge, Kris Kringle Advent Calendar Challenge 2012, The Baby Years, Thoughts

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    Well, the Aussie Daddy Blogger Kris Kringle Advent Calendar Challenge 2012 has kicked off into high gear with some surprising questions and answers that make 50 Shades of Grey look like a Greeting Card. So, rather than repost everything here, it’s easier to see it all under one roof, (just like a Daddy Expo or dare I say…Exposé?).

    So, for all the weird and wacky, click on the Official Daddy Blogger Seal for the full rundown of hilarious posts by our uniquely minded, Aussie Daddy Bloggers. (more…)