0-6 MONTHS

  • 5 THINGS THEY DON’T TELL YOU ABOUT BEING A DAD

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, 3-5 years, D-scoveries, The Baby Years, Thoughts, Tips, Toddler Years

    5 Comments

    Being a Dad is pretty awesome and there’s always a lot of advice and tips that people are always willing to give a first time Daddy-to-be. But there’s quite a few things that nobody ever told me about being a Dad which would have been handy to know in the beginning to properly prepare and psych myself for.

    So I’ve compiled a short list of things I’ve discovered myself and am willing to share with any Daddy newbies out there.

    Here’s a quick list of 5 things nobody tells you about being a Dad:

    1. Baby fingernails are sharper than adamantium claws.

    The only thing worse than hearing fingernails on a blackboard is having your cheeks, eyelids, lips and nostrils shredded to pieces by tiny razor-like Kruegeresque knives forged in the belly of a dragon at the bottom of a volcano.

    2. Despite what you think, babies are not as vulnerable as they look.

    Even though babies come into this world vulnerable and defenceless, it only takes a few months before their inherent self-defence ninja skills come to the fore. They may look incredibly cute and adorable lying in your arms as you gently rock them to sleep, but they can incapacitate an elephant simply by totally pinching the sh*t out of the skin on your neck with the strength and accuracy of a Vulcan warrior. (more…)

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  • CO-SLEEPER CLONES

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Gadgets, The Baby Years

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    Back in December, I posted about My DIY Co-Sleeper, which I built for Mumma to get easy access to our gal after she was born so she didn’t have to get up, lean over and lift her in and out in the middle of the night.

    It continues to get quite a response and I’ve been contacted several times requesting a copy of my plans so they can build their own.

    One such request came from expectant father, Adam Harrison, whose first child is due any moment. Adam is a DIY hobbyist with a list of impressive projects including a large wooden linen cabinet, a rustic covered litter box and a tall space-saving shelving unit all in preparation for their new baby.

    And the crowning glory was of course, a beautiful baby co-sleeper based on my original designs, with a few tweaks for their own particular house and the materials he had on hand. The finished product looks magnificent and Adam was generous enough to send me some pics to share with you all. (more…)

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  • MY DIY CO-SLEEPER

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, 3rd Trimester, Gadgets, The Baby Years

    74 Comments

    After Mumma’s Caesarian with little Alice, it’s six weeks of recovery with no driving, no lifting anything heavier than the baby (lucky it wasn’t me or I’d have a hard time going to the bathroom, if I wasn’t allowed to lift anything heavier than a baby) 😉, and definitely no hanky-panky.

    Which is why my eyebrows flew off my head when Mumma mentioned a threesome. What she actually meant was three of us sharing the bed, due to the fact that Alice is a brilliant sleeper during the day, but at night, just wants to be held. Kind of like my lonely single years during the late 90’s.

    But co-sleeping with the baby in the bed can lead to all kinds of issues such as overheating or a risk of waking up with a baby pancake in between you (ie: my personal greatest fear), not to mention being a highly effective cock-blocker, and is somewhat frowned upon by the SIDS people.

    So we decided to put the baby basinet beside the bed instead. Problem with that is it’s a good Danny Devito size taller than our bed, meaning Mumma has to use her tummy muscles to get up out of bed and reach up and over into the basinet to pick Alice up, which is against all the rules for a healthy recovery. (more…)

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  • ALICE IN WONDERLAND

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Events, In the Womb, The Baby Years

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    Our trip to Wonderland began with another journey down the rabbit hole, and what did we find?

    A menagerie of mad hatters; red, blue and white. (I’m always surprised as to why a bald man such as myself, is still required to wear a hair net in an operating theatre). But them’s the rules, I guess?

    Cheshire Cat grins a mile wide, and a lovely little girl named…

    Alice Nevada Bechtold

    Born at 10:23am on…what day was it again? Oh, yes…

    Remembrance Day!

    3.95kg and 52cm in length for those running a pool at work or the TAB. So, 5 grams lighter than Indy but 2cm taller and looks so amazingly like Indy, they look like twins born 2 and a half years apart! (more…)

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  • THE SEQUEL: HIGHS AND LOWS

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, D-scoveries, Events, In the Womb, The Baby Years, Thoughts, Ultrasound

    14 Comments

    Our journey into parenthood began a couple years ago with Four Little Words, “You’re f*#ng kidding me!” Now that we’re writing the sequel, there were actually zero words. Just shock. Open-mouthed, jaw dropping shock…for about a day and a half!

    The day before my birthday Mumma approached me on the couch and said, “Hold your hands out…”. Slightly confused and a little disappointed that whatever was behind her back was neither the size nor shape of golf clubs, when she placed the stick with two lines in my hand…my mind got carted for a six!

    Next thing I remember, it was Wednesday.

    Wow, for those who don’t know our story, we tried for 10 years to get pregnant. Endured 9 failed attempts of IVF, quite a few miscarriages and even a visit to a witch doctor but still no dice. We both turned 40 and decided it wasn’t to be, so we decided to have holidays instead of kids. We packed up and moved to Bali for 5 months and fell pregnant naturally with our miracle boy, Indy Wayan, within the first month of living there. Now, he’s just turned 22 months old and is the joy of our lives.

    Never ever in our wildest dreams did we ever expect to ever get pregnant again. EVER! It’s one of those things we always said, “if it happens, it happens”, and we always thought it would be lovely to have another kid, but we never truly actually believed it would (or even could), ever actually really happen. So yes, I was gobsmacked and totally paralysed internally.

    Can we really do this? Is it real? Indy was such a great baby, what if this one’s the devil or worse, barracks for Collingwood? What if it’s a girl? I know nothing about girls, I’m 43 years old now and still don’t understand women fully. What if it’s another boy? I love Indy so much, can I actually even love another baby? I’m considering going back to uni in July. Can we even afford another baby? How will Mumma cope? How will I cope? How will Indy cope? (more…)

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  • WELL, THIS JUST HAPPENED…

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, 1-2 years, D-scoveries, Events, In the Womb, The Baby Years, Thoughts

    18 Comments

    Never ever ever ever expected this to happen a second time.

    Will say more on this after I’ve had a little lay down…

    20140318-113517.jpg

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  • 2012 WORDPRESS REVIEW

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Events, The Baby Years, Thoughts, Tips

    2 Comments

    Wowzers!

    Thank heavens for cheeky monkeys. The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

    Here’s an excerpt:

    600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 6,500 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 11 years to get that many views.

    Click here to see the complete report.

    Loves me some WordPress goodness. Check it out, it’s very cool.

    See you next year!!!

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  • 2012: A YEAR IN REAR-VIEW

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Events, The Baby Years, Thoughts

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    2012…the year we had to have.

    Well, we didn’t have to. I mean, some people didn’t want us to have it at all. (At least, not all of it…bloody Mayans). What do they know? Certainly nothing about making calendars, that’s for sure.

    Imagine if things had ended on December 21…it would be like watching The Sixth Sense and turning it off with two minutes left to go and thinking…

    “Yeah, it was okay but…I didn’t really get it?”

    But for us, it was a phenomenal year. Not to mention, it was the best year of Indy’s life(and he only came in at the half way mark, around when Haley Joel Osment tells Bruce Willis, he sees dead people).

    Adjusting my rear-view mirror as 2012 disappears over the horizon, I see we had the birth of our beautiful boy, the Swans won the Grand Final, I got Indy got…some gnarly signatures on my his Swans cap, I paid off my car and remain unofficially debt-free, the end of the world didn’t happen (always good to know it’s exactly where you left it, under your pillow, when you wake up in the morning), aliens didn’t invade us (and frankly, how could they? Haven’t you seen Border Security? You can’t even bring rice into the country, let alone some extra-terrestrial beings. Apparently it’s only one terrestrial being per passenger, “extras” will have to be declared, I’m afraid). (more…)

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  • SANTA’S LI’L HELPER

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Events, The Baby Years, Thoughts

    2 Comments

    Waking up to the sounds of a giggling child, I’m reminded that I really should change my alarm ring tone to something a little more grown-up. And as I hit the snooze and roll over to be greeted by the warm comfort of baby sick down my front, I’m also reminded that I really should shower and change my shirt before coming to bed of an evening.

    But amid the fabricated exploits of this morning’s misadventures, I can’t help but feel there’s a certain sense of excited anticipation about this morning that I haven’t experienced since my wedding night, and before that…when I was a kid. If only I could put my finger on exactly what it is…oh, wait. I know what it is. It must be…

    Christmas Morning!!

    And the reason for my heightened level of excitement, is of course, the fact that this is…

    Indy’s First Christmas…

    And our first Christmas…as a family. (more…)

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  • 40YROLDDAD’S CHRISTMAS ADVENT BLOG POST

    AUTHOR: // CATEGORY: 0-6 months, Daddy Blogger Challenge, Kris Kringle Advent Calendar Challenge 2012, The Baby Years, Thoughts, Tips

    12 Comments

    On the 8th day of Christmas my Facebook stalker, militant communists Aussie Dad Bloggers gave to me – a story about why men can’t see sh#t, right in front of their face. You asked, we answer… in the Christmas spirit, us Aussie Dad Bloggers are answering the questions raised by readers.

    Q: “Are men ACTUALLY visually impaired when it comes to locating objects inside the home?”

    The short answer…NO.

    The slightly longer answer…NU-UH.

    Trust me, there’s plenty of objects inside the home we have absolutely no trouble locating with our eyes closed. The corner of the coffee table in our shin, the die-cast metal hot-wheels car underfoot, our own playground equipment downstairs.

    Men are like dolphins, and use echo location sonar to find objects we can’t see. Dolphins use a series of clicks and whistles to locate objects underwater like fish, sunken treasure and universal remote controls. Men use a slightly more complex version of sounds such as, “Where’s the bloody car keys?” or “What happened to the potato masher?” With dolphins, the sonar bounces off the objects and back to the dolphin, helping him to determine it’s location. With men, the sound bounces back in a more female tone such as, “Did you try looking in the kitchen drawer?” or “They’re right in front of you on the bench!”

    However…if you are a theoretical physicist or even a keen fan of Doctor Who, then you will no doubt realise there is an actual phenomenon that exists in the universe, known as “Brittany Spears” or in scientific terms…

    “Temporal Displacement”

    Which sounds like something you do when you momentarily lose your mind, or skim rocks off Japanese battered fish…wait…that’s tempura. (Really, I thought was a car?) (more…)

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