Step aside Twilight Zone, two-steps to the left Amazing Stories and kneel down and bow your head LOST, because our little man just officially blew my mind during breakfast that sent a shock wave of “What the…” rippling down our spines.
Checking my emails at the table while Indy munched through his honey-toast dip-dip in his high chair beside me, my spider-sense tingled at the sound of water streaming into the pool under his chair. Fully expecting to look up and see him pouring his water bottle over the side, I was shocked to see it was still in its place, untouched on the table and he was contending with a chewy piece of crust.
But underneath his chair, lurking like an aquatic troll, was a golden pool of liquid that immediately sunk my spirits and made me groan internally. Oh no, he’s peed himself in his high chair.
Mumma saw the shock wave ripple in her cup of tea from my sunken shoulders and leapt to lend a hand, but upon inspecting our presumably soaking cherub, he was actually…bone dry! His fiddly bits tucked away inside his nappy and not a drop of wee down his leg hole, his waistband or anywhere in between. But I heard it spill down into the pool and the evidence is clearly…evident.
How the hell did he do that?
We can only surmise that our son has the ability to transport his pee outside of his body, in the same way they transport people on Star Trek, or he peed himself from another dimension. Another Indy in an alternate universe peeing into our universe. A worm-hole wee-wee. A timey-wimey toilet. A portal potty perhaps?
Which means somewhere in another dimension is another 40YrOldDad asking, “Where the hell did that wee-wee go? I know you just did one because your pants are wet, but the pool under your high chair is bone dry!”
I need to sit down. My head is spinning. As much as I love sci-fi, this is just way too creepy weird to wrap my head around.